Of Fairy Tales and Princes

I had a typical childhood, I guess. I had dolls to play with, had the neighbors' kids as friends, older cousins who picked on me, and aunts/uncles who doted on me. I also grew up to stories of Cinderella, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, Rapunzel, and the Little Mermaid.

What’s wrong with these stories? They tell us of a physically, mentally, and/or emotionally weak and fragile girl (and I mean girl, not woman) who needs to be rescued by a strong, rich, and handsome prince (and it’s ALWAYS a prince! Or in rare instances, a knight in shining armor) for them to live happily ever after.

And then there are stories like “Frog Prince”, which basically tells us that if we put up with enough crap from a guy, he will eventually become everything we want him to be, a.k.a our prince.

So we grow up either dreaming of a strong prince or a shining knight to eventually find us, save us from our troubles, and support us for the rest of our lives, OR we start picking up and kissing frogs left and right, all the while expecting them to turn into princes.

But if we want to be happy, we need a paradigm shift. Fairy tales are just that – fictional stories told to kids who don't want to go to sleep. In the real world, there is no perfect prince, we are not sheltered princesses, and we do not always end up with the person we want to be with.

Remember that :

1. We don't need to be rescued. We are strong women capable of defending ourselves, if needed.

2. We are or can be self-sufficient. A lot has changed since the days of fairy tales and a lot of women are capable of managing successful careers, companies, and even countries.

3. A frog is a frog is a frog – he will never turn into a prince. The sooner we realize and accept that, the sooner we can grab at our chance at happiness.

4. Waiting is useless and self-defeating. We can and must create our own happy endings.

5. We do not want to be placed on a pedestal to be looked up to, nor do we want to be treated like a child incapable of thinking for herself. We are looking for partners – equals who will watch our backs as we go through our daily battles, just as we will watch theirs.